I enjoy entertaining myself in thinking that I have it all together. And then in the middle of that thought my world gets turned upside down. Rightfully so. Life is full of decisions, ones that will grow you, guide you, and mold certain aspects of your future. I am eighteen, and a senior in high school. My life is dominated by decisions. Or so it feels like. I let those decisions dictate who I will become. Letting all of that pressure overcome my emotions. I need an awakening.
Humbled. Those decisions are important, yes. But not life. And they were never intended to be my life. As most teenagers do, I tend to have tunnel vision. Seeing only what is in the "now." Pulling back from that has been a huge blessing. Because as soon as I do, I see him.
His life is precious.
More valuable than words.
Full of love. And joy.
You give him hope.
And Father you hold him now.
You guide his path.
But do not guarantee tomorrow.
You are with him in his tears.
He is the heart of the Father.
An orphan.
And then...I remember why I'm alive. For him. To serve the orphan and the widow. Then suddenly all of those decisions fall into place. Worry and anxiety creep away leaving me only with desperation and passion. I can't do this by myself. I don't know why I even try. But because of His faithfulness, Messiah gently reminds me, in the middle of all those decisions that I am not in control. Never have been. And never will be. All I can do is close my eyes, hold my breath, and jump. While in the process think of the orphan, with no mom or dad to tuck him in at night, to wipe away his tears, and pray with him before he falls asleep at night.
"True religion is caring for the orphans and widows in their distress" James 1:27
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